That. Crazy. Girl.

I have not blog for a very long time due to laziness. Lol.

I am back in NYP, doing my advance diploma in orthopaedic. I am into the 3rd week of school, still enjoying and coping. Stress already set in with all the research and psychosocial assignments. Still searching for articles.. =((

Being in school make me have more time to rest my feet and catch up on the movies I missed..Very happy!!

At times, there is still unhappiness. I don’t know there are so many selfish people around us. It is not that I don’t want to share. Do u see the problem is: in the first place, u didn’t even offer to share!!! I seriously want not to talk to u anymore…

Of course, I kind of miss work.. I am used to working!! hahaha.. School is good too, getting to know all my classmates and gossiping, complaining about our hospitals and the drs!!!! We compared our institutions and discovered that sgh is slighty better.

… going to catch a movie, Coraline.

Goodbye and hope you are feeling much more better over there. If the accessibility of medical services is better, maybe you will be still around. Ambulance refuse to send u to the hospital- may they be cursed.

I feel lost. The only thing I could do is  to help mummy book bus tickets.

I am sorry I couldn’t see you after you were sick, I should have taken time off work. The last time I saw you was during CNY. You were still doing well. I am sorry now for not attending the funeral.

Life is really unpredictable.

Though we were not really close, I hope you are relief from all the pain you were suffering from.

Take Care.

We do love and care about you.

Like what a friend of mine have said, why do I care so much. If this person means nothing to me, no matter what this person say should not affect me!

It is kind ofaffecting right now. My mind just keep replaying the whole incident. argh!

Sorry if I made u angry or said something inappropriate. I was not trying to be funny.That was the first thing that came to my mind. After some reflection. Yea, it is kind of stupid to say that!

I am not that knowledgeable, I do make a effort to learn. I did not lie to you. I really did try my best.

I don’t know whether you have any expectations from me. I apologise if I do not meet them. But that is who I am.

Still want to express my gratitude. I learnt something today. And I hope you will nv read this, which I think you will not.

Let’s wait to see how things turn out.

Till I get enough sleep,
the girl who is still trying her best.

I was going thru the posts from last time. I realised my life has changed. Last time I always blog about happy things and outings with my friends.

Nowadays are just rantings from work… There is lots of things I miss from my polytechnic life!!

I wish I could go back to school…

I miss cycling with my friends. ( and of cus the occasional bumping into celebrities. LOL.)

I miss the occasional chalet and bqq though we have our differences. – let’s have one this year again!

I miss going orchard withpik sun!! I miss Sentosa..

I miss that phuket trip with Jasmine and Kuan Yong. (can we go again in nov?)

I miss the crazy and cold hong kong trip with Jasmine and SzeMin.

I miss me and SzeMin running to class when we took a late 159. -she cant run now anymore.. too pregnant!

I miss the swimming sessions we always go for in between lessons and the tons of suntan oil I applied.

I miss Jasmine’s cursing sessions whenever she is driving and we are late for class.

I miss Jasmine’s irritating voice on the morning waking me up to go eat wanton mee. (I have not eat tt wanton mee for ages.)

I miss the serious and irritated faces SzeMin, Pik Sun and PeiNingput on whenever we are discussing about ICAs. (They do get very violent sometimes.. haha)

I miss sleeping in the NYP library. I miss talking loudly in the discussion room and getting hushed by the librarian.

I miss going to PeiNing house to sleep and watch movies!!

I miss going to Ikea with PeiNing and Pik Sun. I always end up with lots of rubbish!! (screams: HOTDOGS AND MEATBALLS!!!)

I miss going north canteen, south canteen, FJ, macdonalds with my classmates!!!!!!

I miss talking, sleeping, eating macdonalds inside the lecture theatre.

I miss the lab lessons and always guessing who is having tt smelly feet!! Till this day, I still have no idea.

I miss that very cold air-conditioner of the computer lab.

erm.. I do not miss the cadaver in the bio lab..

I miss going to that particular toilet near the library with my friends.-the clean and nice one.

The list still goes on. There is really a lot of things I miss!!!!! Esp all my friends!!

I am sure there is a lot things I miss out. If I do remember them, I will write them down again.

To be continued…

I am struggling between hiding or showing. Sometimes, you don’t know whether you should stand up or hide behind. If I choose to show, I may not be where I am now. If I hide, people will tend to bully me. Tell me how..

I choose the way I live my life. There are just some things I do not like to do. Everyone is different, I am just not that extraordinary girl who obeys every order.

At times, I am angry but I don’t show it. I shrug it off or dismiss u as very idiotic. If I am considered young and inexperienced, doesn’t mean my sensory gland is not working. I can still sense the underlying meaning behind your words and actions.

I was never really very hurt till that day when someone made a very crude comment to me. You can ask why it hurts? It is because I never thought that someone would make such a comment. A comment that involves one of my dearest ones. Family- I can only have one, but I can have many jobs. I am upset. Till today, I still am very upset. I can never forget that comment ever. NEVER.

I have been pondering about an idea for quite long. Now, I have decided. Nothing can change my mind. It is very unfair and very obvious. Why do I have to put up with this? I am also human with blood flowin in my body…

Unfair. –

Whatever it is… I want to thank all my friends(Jasmine, NeoNeo, Miss Woo, Zi Hui, Wang Jing, Farhah, Kak-kak Aini) for their concern. And to everyone who listen to my woes and complains, esp Juliette who received it 1st-hand!!! Those whose names are not mentioned, you are not forgotten… just too long a list.

************

I dedicated the message below to one of my dearest friend:

Most of the times, our environment force/mould us into what we are. No matter how hard we try, we can never change the way things work. I know you are tired. All of us are tired too.

I noticed that the smiles on your face are decreasing and frowns are increasing… Very scary!! I still like the old bubbly you.

This difficult period is changing us all. And nowadays, we go out lesser. I really hope this period will be over soon and everything will be back to normal. Though things will never be the same again.

Smile more. Take a step back and look at everything from a different view.

Take Care.

************

Till my cough gets better.

X.o.X.o. shin^_^

2008 hadbeen quite the roller coaster ride for me starting from 1/1/2008..  Lol. The ride has never stop, even till now.

My health has not been that good either, kept seeing doctors. For now, they had all settled down. I hope my health will be better in 2009. I shall start to take good care of myself. Haha! very difficult with all my late nights and night shifts.

I am now 20+1.. Argh, I am in the twenties club now. And it seems that I have not achieve much in life, except for a job…

Whatever it is, I just don’t like 2008. It has not been a good year for me: my health, irritating pple in my life and etc…

Can I wish that 2009 be better?? (Now that irritating pple are gone from my life.)

I am working on 31/12/08 and 1/1/09… Arr I want to go countdown. There had not been much celebration this year, last year was better…

Our friendship has certainly  drifted apart.. gatherings minus.. Is that what working mould us into?? hmm…. busy schedules, new lives, boyfriends…

That’s all.

Till 2009…

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

P.S. Want to thank everyone for their presence on my birthday and of cus all the lovely gifts!!! TQ~

P.S.S. Looking forward to 2009 ..

I don’t want anything to change.

Happy with the present situation.

Not going to be silly for the 3rd time… That feeling kind of sucks.

2 times in a year is more than enough.

I hate 2008!!!

2008 has been not that fantastic for me, I think.

Sigh. Maybe my expectations was set too high up.

Whatever… I can only look forward and not backwards now..

Love,
X.O.X.O
Shin Yee.

Tiring day…

8.30 am- Left home.

9.15am- Reach hospital, met Farhah. Had breakfast at Delifrance.

10am to 12.30pm- Blood transfusion seminar.

12.30pm to 1.30pm- Hang out in the ward, disturbing my busy colleagues, while waiting for Simin.

1.30pm- Met Simin at Delifrance in hospital. Off we went to PS. I wanted to eat Ashtons’, got craving for steak.. Lol. But was stuck at PS, can’t walk over to The Cathay..

2.30pm to 7.15pm- Had steak at Ashtons’ and  Ben&Jerry ice-cream. Feel so bloated.
Decided to catch a movie, but couldn’t decide between “the day the earth stood still” or ” angus, thongs and perfect snogging”…
Wanted to have a good laugh, so………… Angus, thongs and perfect snogging!!!!!

This movie is directed by the same director of  “bride and prejudice” and “bend it like beckham”… All my favorites. Great movies.. Encouraging all friends to go watch!!! Georgia is like so real. A real teenage girl exploring relationships, family and sorts… When she did something embarassing, I felt myself blushing in the cinema too.

hmmm… maybe a long time ago, I also did embarassing things before.

Back to my day. I also booked myself for massage on tuesday. LOL. It is high time I pampered myself a little. Looking forward to it.

7.15pm to 8pm- Me time. Simin went off for a birthday party.(Sidetrack: so many birthday parties these days.) I wandered around PS and bought myself 2 tops and a sub for my mum’s supper.

8pm to 10.30pm- Met up with Neo, lil princess and her group of friends(too long a list la). Had dinner at this sushi place in The Cathay (AGAIN!!). chit chat, take photos….. Then I felt really fatigue, so I went off.

11.15pm- Reached home. Was on the phone with Guan Yi. Found my door was bolted by my father.. Lucky my brother was till awake to open the door for me. Thank God!

Seriously miss GY a lot. Since she was back from India, nv really catch up with her. Shall do so when I go out with her next week. And all of us is going to watch Snow White!!!! Yea~

Time now: 1.25am (14/12/08) 4 more days to bonus. very Very tired… Zzzzzzzzz..

X.o.X.o
Till Bonus day.
Shin^_^

Videos for today:

The Stiff  Dylans- my new favourite boyband!!!

How to eat sushi???

I am sure nobody like to be left out or behind. So in order not to get left behind, we make changes or adapt to changes..

The time will never stop for us.. It will continue to move even if we regret something.. We forget our old-time friends and move on to our new friends.

And we never stop to consider the feelings of our old-time friends. Why? It is very sad..

I am tired. Real tired. I have tried. I do not want to make anymore sacrifices… It is not worth it.

^^^^^^^^^^^^

Personally, I do not like the idea of working 5 mornings. I am sure all nurses know why. Seriously, when some people ask u to change ur shift, do they even look at ur roster? Plus does she even ask u in a nice way??

Pls respect people, we are also human.. Thank you very much.

And when you say no and wants to explain the reason, they told u not to complain.. Oh please, if I do want to complain, I will not complain to u!!!

^^^^^^^^^^^^

It  seems that my heart doesn’t function well anymore, as how it injured itself earlier this year. I am immune to almost everything now. Even if I do blabber on about some cute guys, it just doesn’t get that irregular and fluttering feeling anymore..

I have plans for 2009…. secret plan in the making~

 Till I finalised my plan,
Shin^_^