That. Crazy. Girl.

A recent span of events have led me to believe that I am very stupid. I never thought I was smart or anything..

But some events and people really make me ponder am i too kind or am i too stupid?? I am very drained out from work on saturday due to mc rates. And I guide a new SN, considering how new I am myself. And another colleague who is only 6 months old and have never nursed ‘B2′ patients, which I have to help her a lot. There is even an AMA(against medical advice) discharge to settle. Which my colleague had nv done before.

If you don’t want treatment, might as well don’t come to hospital. Do not trouble other people, please. Anyway, it is his leg, not mine!!! Since I am on the topic on patients, I shall elaborate more.

To all people: (who are/going to be patients)

1. Pls do not threaten/scolde the nurses. We are humans too. Although hospital say “we will take action against those who abused our staff” Sorry! I nv see actions being taken. Only thing I see: Patient complains = nurses fault. WTF!!!
2. Please do not try to be spokesperson for other patients. You will be deemed as irritating and kpo. If u are so well, might as well discharge. Just keep your  mouth shut!!!
3. Stop screaming if you are not in pain… And don’t scream when we didnt even touch u.
4. And don’t always think u still smell nice after not showering for 10 days and pee on ur bed for like 100 times. It is just plain SMELLY.

I guess that is about all. Can’t think of anymore now.

Gosh!! tell me how many hands and legs and mouth I have. I am not superman ok!!! or rather superwoman..

Yes. I am complaining becus all these are stored in my heart. It is difficult to function with a overloaded heart.. I do understand the lack of staff but why is it me? I am like always the jinx person walking around.

Just like a disaster waiting to happen… I can’t take it anymore. I need to relief my stress. Really need to.

Next issue then.

I am not good in PR-ing or interpersonal relationships. The least I know is to respect people and be polite. And try not to make other people feel small/stupid.

I seriously seriously don’t understand, why some people just cannot take jokes and are super anal.. You life must be like super boring.

We really can’t judge a book by its’ cover.. That’s what I want to say about some people. Nice on outside, super rotten inside. If you feel forced or not happy, let me know. No point throwing some stupid tantrum and saying things to make me feel so dumb.

I don’t think I am dumb. Period.

I hate you. Glad to discover so early. Thank you for letting me know the truth.

P.S. ‘B2′ patients- long term, complicated wounds, discharge problems, anal which make this group of patients difficult to nurse. B2- a station in my ward.

P.S.S. Pls forgive me for the language and this post of complain. I am just too stressed up and depressed..

I have just lost a very good friend and I feel insecure.

I am very worried for a friend of mine. She always seems strong to me. She is the one who always comfort me, give me advice not the other way round.

These few days, she really seem like she is going to break down soon. She really need a good and long rest. No matter how much I try to reassure her, she is still feeling down. Maybe it is due to the workload or that test? Everyday her assignment is different.. nursing different patients.

Sometimes it is just kind of stress to nurse different pts everyday. You are not clear about that and BOOM!! The next day, you are not taking care of the patient anymore. Really cause stress and anxiety… Worse, if you are morning shift.

If some people ask u about your pt and you are nt really sure. It is kind of embarassing. Eg. Like today, people ask me about my pt going for duplex scan, I didn’t even know about it. Cus it is my first day nursing the patient.

Really kind of not safe for patients lo.. And I hate not knowing about the patients.

Whatever!! I don’t want to care anymore. I have enough problems as it is.

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Can you just stop??? I just don’t understand. I don’t know what you want or what is in your brain? I tried to bury my feelings, don’t dig them out again. Don’t be so cruel to me, can?

Why can’t anyone just understand? Is it so difficult??

P.S. I just want Grey’s Anatomy season 5 1st episode… I love it!!!

Never would I thought I will be a nurse. And injured my ankle. All in all, I gain something. A great bunch of friends in the line of nursing. A very tedious job.

Maybe I should get a new job. Lol.

Watched Wall-e. Seriously, I nearly fall asleep during the 1st half. Cus the dialogue was only: “wall-eeeeee” and “e-vaaaaaa”.

I thought I will be ok after so long. Really. But still, I am not. Though I sort of know the truth, I still feel jealous.(what’s wrong with me?) I know my attitude was no good but I couldn’t face talking to you. It is always so difficult talking to you. Difficult for me, at least.

I wish I nv knew the truth. Keep me in the dark.

Am I so difficult to get along with? Like what these horoscope analysis say? Whatever!!!

Time and again, I told myself not to indulge. Still… I can’t control. argh, so angry with myself!

Today, I discovered things are not so simple. Not so simple as it seem on the surface. If you are involved in something, there is lots expected and to be fulfill. So I have decided to be a free person. No restrictions or whatsoever until I am ready!!! Yea~

XoXo

ShinYee

Neither me nor the blog is dead. In case, you are wondering.

Is just that I am too tired. Too much going on. If all goes well tml, i will surely blog.

Pls pray for me..

Was Raining…

Was nice to wake up in the morning with the knowledge that i do not need to answer any call bells today.. Let me tell you, call bells are murderers!!!! Whoever who invented call bells should be slowly tortured to death~ Really!

No normal person like call bells. Seriously.

Mum and I decided to do some shopping at Orchard. Been a very good girl, didn’t buy anything at all. I am so proud of myself!! Whatever~

Going to HK soon.. 4 more days and counting.. looking forward to all the food and shopping~ Esp the shopping part..

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Was reading my previous blog entry. The question to tell or not to tell pop up in my mind again. How? I know no one call tell me what to do. This is something I need to face myself. Sometimes it is there, sometimes it is not.

To say that I have move on is not really true. Moving on is kind of difficult when he is always there.

****

I hate rainy days.. looks depressing.

Whatever~

This is how we always start our story telling in primary school with that super cute voice of ours.

My voice was cute, I don’t know about yours. But I have grew out of my cute voice since then. I don’t need my cute voice at this age of mine. However I wish life will be as simple as before.

Everyone as innocent as before. Everyone are friends. How come it become so complicated when we grow up?

We make it complicated by ourselves? We deserve it? Sigh.

Now I don’t story tell, I only read stories! (Sidetrack: I wanna read Babara Smit: Sneakers’ War. I bought some storybooks again.)

What was written above is all rubbish lah. I have got nothing better to do. I believe that when we got nothing better to do, we will write something and hurt someone heart. So, for those who have no life, find something to do. Don’t be such a sadist. And don’t be pathetic.  

Mouth. Few ways to use it.

1. Eating.
2. Talking.
3. Gossiping.
4. Quarreling. Shouting.

Basically that’s all. We should really avoid using our mouth for the 3rd and 4th. No good. No good at all. Ok. this is irrelevant either.

This post is nonsense.. Don’t know what I am writing about.

Everything happen with a reason. If you aren’t so obvious, nobody would have known.. It would have been a beautiful secret and memory in our hearts. You made it ugly.  So blame no one but yourself. Nobody can force you to do anything you don’t want.

P.S. we should all start to learn to grow up. It is essential~

P.S.S. Looking forward to GG Season 2.

Ever and ever.

No matter how hard I try to perfect the egg mixture, people still manage to find a fish bone in my omelette.

No matter, how well done the omelette is, there is always a fishbone. Even if it is 0.1mm, she still manage to  find it.

I used all the right ingredients, right spices, her favourite flavour… There is still a fish bone present.

Why? 

I don’t ever add fish to my omelette. Where does the fish bone come from??

Arrrrr. I know. She is being fussy and biased. Hmpf!!!!

If it is someone else cooking the omelette, it would be a different story.

I know. I just know.

I only have a pair of hands. How much can I do to make everyone happy?

I need to chop up the ingredients.

I need to beat the eggs.

I need to heat the pan. I need to fry the egg.

I need to flip the egg. I need to serve the egg and present it nicely.

I need to wash the pans, clear the rubbish.

I need to clean up the kitchen.

I need to wash the dishes. 

Just how much can I do?? Don’t ask for too much, cus I can’t and is unable to give.

Continue to fish for fish bones in my omelette. Cus I don’t wanna care so much anymore.

I guess maybe someone else apprepciate my omelettes more than you do.

Whatever. What am I writing about anyway?

I feel I am being stalked..

Too much things on my mind. I am so tired..

It is a time everyone has to be strong.. No matter what.

My gastric is causing me problems again. Stressed out.

No one can really believe what happen to me in the past few weeks.

Overwhelming…

My problems may seem small to others. But I am still troubled.

Really. Some people need to be out of my life.

U suck all my life and everything out of me. I have nothing you can take anymore.

Stop. Please. You have more than me.

Can you stop? Just stop.

I am trying my best already.. I don’t know. I really don’t know.

I don’t know what is real and what is not. Whether you are someone super fake or you are really what you are.

I do not wish to guess anymore. Do whatever u like.

I am sorry to say that I feel like puking when looking at u or hearing your voice. I think u are way too fake.

I want to be happy. H-A-P-P-Y.

Whatever la. I am writing rubbish. Work is wearing me out.

Can I not work? Too tired to go on already. But I care too much. That is what is bad. Caring too much.

I should stop considering about others except for myself. I shall stop being nice to everyone.

I want to be evil !!!!!!!

P.S. I really HATE you….

P.S.S. I don’t know how to use my new phone. And I kind of hate it.